Saturday, September 03, 2005
I don't feel sad happy nor angry I don't know how I feel what is happening to me? I can't even understand myself let alone understand others. I cant even solve my own problems and troubles let alone others'. I easily feel jealous easily get angry easily get moody. I don't know what's happening to me? Am I sick or what? Sometimes I feel like there is no one to care for me to listen to my troubles. But actually is I don't feel like sharing with anyone. But when I keep it all to myself I feel like I bursting. Maybe I just can't find someone whom I can really talk to. If there's no choice maybe have to go seek the help of a counselor. I just don't know what I want what I am thinking or doing I don't understand myself at all. a failure in living I am indeed. but yesterday try to talk with my friend about how I feel, feel better but the weird feeling is still there. My friend says she feels that way too but just don't know why it happen. Every time I smile I don't smile that truly that genuinely. It has been a long time since I laugh wholeheartedly. I don't carry my smile as often as I do last time now. I just don't understand myself. I look like a stranger to myself. Someone whom I have never met before, some one whom I truly don't understand.